Here For You

Lets be honest now, there are a lot of things that really get me irritated. I won't even begin to list them all. But nothing gets me more annoyed than when friends don't listen to the advice I give them, after asking for it.

It's one thing to not take advice when you don't want to hear it. I completely understand that. I don't always take people's advice. No one wants to hear the truth when it isn't what they want to believe. That I can completely understand. It's when someone asks for my advice or opinion, then completely ignores it.

When I give my friends my opinion on a serious matter, I say it with complete honesty, because I care about them. I never want to see my friends hurt, therefore I tell them what is on my mind. If you ask for my advice, please, at least consider it. If you don't want it, don't bother asking for it. If you know what I'm going to say because it's not the first time you've heard it, don't bother asking for it. It annoys me.

I love when my friends come to me for help because I love to help them. I care about them and I want them to be happy. When anyone (friend or not) has an issue, I'm always willing to listen and to help out. But only if they want the help. I've spent too much time trying to help people that don't want the help. It has gotten me nothing but frustration. So I'm done.

It's a bit negative tonight, but I'm just fed up. I don't want to go into too much detail because I don't want to subblog. This is happening with multiple people, and I can't handle it. The best I can do is be there for my friends, with advice to give when asked for.

Advice should always be honest. Before asking, make sure you're ready to hear it. I don't sugar coat things anymore.

Spontaneity

What is life without excitement? Without spontaneity? Without surprises? Life is boring. Who wants to live a boring life? Not this girl.

I love when people surprise me. It makes life exciting. No one wants to settle for a boring, daily routine that is never different. Change is good, it's exciting, it's what makes the time we have on Earth worth it. I wish it happened more often, but some people are just too shy. I get it though, I've definitely been there. I can be very shy, but I've gotten much better. I've learned that it can't hurt to be yourself. If people don't like the way you are, they aren't worth the time. Don't get me wrong, I've got nothing against people being shy. Its just that people who are spontaneous are always the most fun to be around. You never know what they are going to do next.

I can't even explain how awesome spontaneous people are. I can't give examples as to what makes them awesome. I don't even know what to say right now. I'm actually at a loss for words. They are just awesome. Simple as that. The fact that they are unpredictable is what makes being around them so exciting. They may ask the most random things, but what makes the night so enjoyable is just saying yes to it. "Want to lay down in the middle of the street?" YES. "Want to attempt to waltz in the middle of a store?" SURE! "Want to drive to the beach right now and spend the entire day there?" OF COURSE.
Life just got 10x more exciting because it became spontaneous.

The same old thing gets boring. Spice things up and do something out of the ordinary.

I Don't Care

I honestly don't care. I don't care what you think of me, I don't care what you say about me, I don't care what you subtweet about me. It doesn't matter, because I don't let it affect me. Which is the problem with about 99% of the high school population. Everyone is too worried about other's opinions.

Be yourself. Two simple words put together to form a simple statement. But it's not that simple, is it? Not many people are willing to be their complete selves because they are afraid of what others will think of them. I'm glad to say that I'm not one of them. The way I act is exactly the way I am. I may be shy at first, but once I get to know you, I break out of my shell and I become myself. Why can't more people feel comfortable doing that?

I don't dress like everyone else just to fit in. I don't talk like everyone else just to fit in. I don't party like everyone else just to fit in. I don't do anything for anyone but me. And if you don't like that, then that really sucks for you. I don't care though. It is what it is.
There isn't much point to this, because honestly, I don't care. (In case you haven't already figured that out)

I guess what I'm trying to say is that people should stop worrying about everyone else and focus on themselves. No one can be happy when constantly worrying about what others think. The only way to be truly happy is to be satisfied with yourself. And the easiest way to do that?! Not caring about what others think of you. Changing the way you are for others can make you fake and turn you into someone you're not. The second you let what someone says about you affect you, you're letting them control you. Don't give them the power to shape who you are. The reason you were given that power in the first place is because you are the only one who can use it to the full potential.
Subtweets are a whole different topic, yet closely related. I don't understand why people are so offended with them. All a subtweet does is let you know that 1) you're being talked about and 2) the person tweeting doesn't have the guts to say it to your face. If all you do is subtweet, you're pathetic. I get the occasional subtweet every once in a while if it's directed towards a group, rather than just an individual, but all the time? Come on now. That's not what twitter is for, and I'd rather not have to weed through constant bitching every time I reload twitter. (Which is often. I have a bit of a problem, but I'm okay with it.)
Genius idea! How about we act like the mature kids we SHOULD be and talk to each other in person rather than subtweeting about it. I think it would solve a lot more problems and maybe, just maybe, I won't be forced to unfollow anyone. But if subtweeting is your thing, if it's what gets the blood flowing, then whatever. I don't care. It was just a thought.

Subtweet, gossip, complain. Do whatever you want. Bottom line: it's still about me, and I still don't care.
"Love me or hate me, it's still an obsession"

Girls?

I feel that, because I'm a girl, it is acceptable for me to rant about how annoying the female sex is. But just before I start this, I'm not denying that I do any of this. I'm sure I have in the past, or maybe I still do. It's just annoying things I notice.

First off, when girls make degrading jokes about themselves, it just makes me angry. Like, does anyone realize how long it took for women to even have the right to vote in this country? Women in the past worked so hard to have the rights that women today have, but we don't realize how much we take it for granite. Second, why on Earth would anyone degrade their own sex!? That is just stupid right there. I actually find it offensive when guys tell girls to "make them a sandwich". No. You make your own damn sandwich, and while your at it, make one for me! Women aren't there just to cook and clean, despite 95% of guy's beliefs. Women can do anything men can do, yet the society we live in doesn't always allow that, which just makes me so frustrated. Our society is so sexist, and the only ones with the power to change it would rather joke about it and make degrading jokes. If it keeps up like this, I bet women will have less rights in the future than they do now. It's just irritating.

Next, when girls, mainly high school girls, move from one guy to the next to the next, it actually makes me laugh. Some girls are so dependent on someone else to make them happy, they don't even realize what they are doing. I have come to the conclusion that we are born to be individual, but finding a "significant other" is just an added bonus. They aren't needed, but they are nice to have. When I see girls with one guy one weekend, and a completely different guy the next, I wonder to myself what they are thinking, or what they are doing. No judgement though, if that's what floats their boat, then by all means. It's just not my cup of tea.

Oh goodness, don't even get me started on some of the outfits I see in the halls of Sunset. It makes me embarrassed to even attend the school. We are in a high school, not a strip club. I don't even want, or need, to go into it any more than that.

Then, of course, you can't talk about girls without talking about the stupid mind games we play. I, personally,  don't like to participate in these, because it's never fun. Someone always ends up hurt. But other girls, for some reason, think its funny. (Again, whatever floats their boat) Who even came up with these stupid rules anyway? Like if a guy you like texts you, you're not allowed to reply until 5 minutes later, after your message is approved by your closest friends. Who does that?! Why can't girls just be straight up? There are so many relationship issues, and who wants to take a guess at what causes them? I can tell you. It's mind games girls play. I hate it. I just absolutely hate it.

Guys, don't think you're the only ones getting screwed over with these mind games though.

Sometimes, I just want to shake some girls and scream at them until they understand why I get so annoyed with them all. But I can't do that, because that would be considered rude. 

Nothing New

I haven't posted anything in a while because, for once, I had nothing to complain about in my life. But seeing as homecoming was on Saturday, the venting beings.
I'll keep this post to one topic: high school relationships.

Seeing as it's fall, it is starting to get cold out, and everyone is ready to snuggle up, all these relationships start popping up right, left, and center. The funniest thing about it though, they don't last past the winter months. Apparently, no one wants to cuddle once the sun starts shining. Typical. Mood swinging teenagers.

Guys say they don't understand girls. Girls say they don't get guys. Its clearly a mutual problem, so why is it not solved yet? Humans are a complex species by nature, but what is so complicated about being honest? If everyone was honest in how they felt and what they wanted out of something, there wouldn't be these mind games being played. Yeah, I'll admit it. Girls can be crazy. We over-analyze things, we create problems, we don't really believe we can have a "fairy tale ending" even though it's all we dream about. We're selfish and spiteful. We're complicated. But that doesn't mean guys are so easy themselves. Don't be too quick to judge.

What really irritates me with high school relationships is not the fact that they never last, but the fact that when they are over, there is awkwardness or drama created around the entire thing. Sure, you dated for 3 months, but there is no need to make a situation awkward when you two are in the same class. Okay, your relationship ended after 6 months, but don't start rumors about how awful of a person they are because they broke up with you. Maybe you need to consider the fact that you were part of the reason the relationship didn't work out. Everything in life is a two way street, so don't blame everything on everyone else. It's not fair to anyone, whether they were directly involved or not.

Relationships are always a complicated matter. The best way to deal with it is to be honest. Funny, you'd think people would understand that. But based on the drama I hear about some relationships, it's clear that some people never got that message.

Negativity Killed the Cat

I am just in such a horrible mood right now. It is probably not the best idea to be blogging, but I don't know what else to do.

Its a proven fact that honest and optimistic people live longer lives, and today, I've decreased my lifespan by about 5 years. Yes, thats how negative I am today. I just have a lot on my plate and not enough time to sort through it all. I need a mental health day, that way, I can just be with my thoughts and figure out what it is that I'm doing with my life.

It's hard to know who to trust these days. Sure, you know you've always got your best friends, but when you need a friend to talk to, how do you know they are going to keep it between the two of you? What makes everything especially difficult is the Internet and phones. I never feel like what I say is kept private, but I suppose shame on me for thinking it could be if it goes on the Internet. It goes beyond that though, because sometimes, I will have a conversation in person with someone, but later hear about how they told people what we said. (If that makes any sense...) No one can keep a secret anymore, and that is just frustrating. I'm no different though, and I'm not trying to make myself sound perfect. I'm far from, and I'm proud to own up to it. I just wish that secrets could be kept. But sometimes, secrets must be spread because no one can keep a good secret to themselves.

I promise to myself and to you that I will try my hardest to be more optimistic and honest. My life will be easier, though some of the honesty may make it harder at times. I know it will be for the best, and I plan to do it.  But just know, if you need a secret to be kept, I keep them as locked as a bank's vault.

Hello High School

People these days have absolutely no idea how they are screwing themselves over. Sure, I guess it sounds cool to be popular, but why waste four years climbing to the top of the social ladder when you just have to start over once college starts? Why wouldn't you use these precious four years discovering who you truly want to be and what you want to do? That way, you just continue where you left off once you get to college, rather than starting over.

Social climbing is fake anyway. You have to act like someone you aren't in order to move up the rungs of high school popularity. Why even bother? I would much rather be considered a loser and be myself. At least I know I will sleep peacefully for the rest of my life. I don't bother coating myself in plastic just to "fit in". If I don't fit in with the people I'm around, I shouldn't be around them. I know who my friends are and I know that they love me for the way that I am, and they fact that I don't care if I'm different, or considered "unpopular". I'm me, so take it or leave it.

On a related topic, lets chat for a bit about "mean girls". (Or sometimes, "mean guys") I don't understand why people think its okay to be rude to one another. Where does it get you in life? NOWHERE! So just stop.  The funny part about mean girls is that they are so horribly rude to innocent people to make themselves feel better, but when they get called out for it, they act like sweet, innocent angels. Hello, we see through you!

Mean girls are insecure about themselves so they have to put others down. But sometimes, as much as it pains you, you just have to let them run their mouth. People these days find confidence in running their mouth over the Internet, but would never have the guts to do it in person. When you're the recipient of this "blast" (which is the stupidest phrase ever), just stick it out and know that you are stronger than the mean girl because you ignore it. All they want is to irritate you to the point that you snap, and when you do, they will twist the story to make you look bad and them look like the angel. The more you ignore it, the less they will run their mouth. Without a reaction from you, they get bored.

Hating on people is just plain stupid. I mean, didn't anyone else learn the rule "treat others how you want to be treated"? They taught that to us in KINDERGARTEN. You would think that by high school people would have figured out what it meant. I'm ashamed to say that some people still don't understand it, and unfortunately, they probably never will.

The important thing to remember is that who you are is not defined by what you wear, how popular you are, or how rude you can be, but how you act. If you act like a bitch, people think you're a bitch. And they are probably right.

Stay strong and be yourself, and no one can break you down.

Always and Forever

There are very few things that are still considered "unconditional" in today's society. Love being the major one. Though some consider love to be the most important thing in life, I disagree. I believe that friendship is more important than love. Love can't be happily found without friendship. I cherish my friends, but I don't tell them that enough.

Friendship is unconditional. It is absolute. It does not change based on moods, feelings, actions, or distance. True friends are always there for one another, through thick and thin. Friends may have their disagreements from time to time, but that's normal. What defines a friendship is not how long you can stand one another, but how long you can support one another. I would do anything for my friends. I would move Heaven and Earth to make sure they live a good life. Nothing is more heart breaking than seeing someone you truly care about beaten down and hurt. Even if my friends don't always have my back, it is a guarantee that I will always have theirs.

I've been through rough times, I've been beaten down, I've had days where I didn't want to do anything because I was so upset. But it gets better. It always gets better. If I didn't have my friends there to support me through those hard times, there's not telling the kind of person I would be today. So each day, I thank my friends for their support. Though I may not always voice these thanks, I'm constantly giving them.

Friends are there to make your life enjoyable. My friends know I'm always open to listen and I will always have their back. I may not sugarcoat things to make them feel better, and though they think the truth hurts, it's a lot easier to deal with than the lies that come out later down the road. Everything I do for my friends is done because I care for them. They deserve the best, and I give them the best I can.

So surround yourself with good people. People you will always care for and people who will always care for you. Friendship is one of the most important things to have in life because without it, you're alone and vulnerable.

Keep it Kla$$y

Sometimes, I can be so embarrassed to say I go to Sunset. Yeah, its great when we beat Jesuit 4-1 in mens varsity soccer, or we go 4-0 in football in God knows how long. But when our "saying" is "we go hard", its a little embarrassing. Or maybe I mean more than a little. You could make the argument that "we go hard" is referring to giving it our all and never backing down from a challenge, but lets be real. Is that REALLY what its referring to, or is there a subliminal message in the saying. I've got a guess, and I think I'm pretty spot on. How about you chase a couple ideas, take a few shots.
I think Sunset has been playing a little too much Ke$ha during lunches, because people are brushing their teeth with Jack just a little too much and taking it all off just a little too often. Why not just cover the school in glitter? That way we can complete the sloppy Ke$ha takeover of Sunset.
I'm not trying to judge you for having fun every once and a while, but blacking out every weekend doesn't sound fun to me. If that's your idea of fun, well, I honestly have nothing to say to that. I'm speechless. I guess I'll have some great stories to tell at your funeral when you die from liver poisoning. If you "go hard" every once and a while, I don't care. If you go every weekend, I don't care either. It just doesn't tickle my fancy.
 Anyway, I better go to Michael's to stock up on glitter. Get $leazy. Ke$ha's taking over.

Branching Out

This year has definitely been the best year of my high school life. I've been completely myself, branched out, and had so much fun. And it's only been a month. I can already tell that senior year is definitely going to be better than I ever expected.

I've met so many new people. Well, technically, I already knew them, but I've gotten to know them a lot better now and I'm so happy about that. These new people I've gotten to know are awesome and I wish I had known them better last year, but the past is in the past; there is nothing I can do about it now. I've realized that time goes by quickly, and we only have a limited amount of it. People should really branch out more often. The world would be a much better place, and there wouldn't be as much drama, or as many cliques. If everyone was civil to everyone else, not only would there be world peace, but high school may actually be bearable.

The classes I'm taking this year are stressful, to say the least. But that doesn't mean I don't enjoy them. When forecasting for senior year, I went in with the thoughts that its the last year I have to pick whatever classes I want; they don't need to relate to a major. And with that in mind, I've compiled quite the schedule. I forecasted for classes I wouldn't have normally taken, and I'm glad I did. I took a risk, and the risk is paying off.

So far, I wouldn't change one thing about this year. I've learned to deal with the people that irritate me by ignoring them. I don't let little things get to me anymore. I act myself, and if you choose not to accept that, then that's your loss. I'm not afraid of high school anymore. I'm not afraid of what people think about me. I'm not afraid of being judged. I know that as long as I'm happy, I've got nothing to worry about. Sure, I've had a couple rough patches so far, what with college and all that, but I've over come those difficulties.
This year, I've learned to never dwell on things in the past. Things change and there is nothing that can be done about it. It just needs to be accepted. They call it the past for a reason. Besides, if I've gone this long, the thing that left clearly wasn't needed.

My friends have been such great support lately, and I want to thank all of them for that. You know who you are. If it weren't for my friends, I don't even know how I would have survived this far. They have been with me for more than just this past month. I'm glad to say I have the most amazing best friends anyone could ever ask for, and without them, my life would be a disaster. They stick with me through thick and thin, as I do, them. High school is a time to truly find yourself. For those of you who have yet to do that, I wish you the best of luck. It may be rough, but in the end, it is completely worth it. I have discovered so much about myself over these last four years, and though it was tough at times, it has made me a better and stronger person.

As I always say, high school is never easy, and if you let it get to you, it will never be easy. Live a carefree life, making sure every day is as good as you can make it. Never have a bad day, and never let a bad thing affect you. "As long as you believe in yourself, you can do anything"

Advice

Today, I was talking with a friend about college and school and how stressed out I am. He had some really good advice to give me, and I thought I'd share some of it it with you.

I was talking about how I feel as if all of my friends know exactly what their post-high school plans are, where they are going, what they are doing, and I feel like I'm miles behind because I have no clue. He told me that it is a completely normal feeling. Everyone gets lost in their life at some point, but they eventually find their way. No one knows exactly what they want to do from the second they are born. It is completely normal to wonder, to have doubts, and to change your ideas.
I was saying how I don't know what to do because I feel like I'm stuck with it for the rest of my life, and what happens if I don't enjoy it? He told me that no one is ever stuck doing anything. If I pick something and later realize it's not what I had in mind, I always have the ability to change it. It's better to pick something and change it a million times than to pick nothing at all. That's the beauty about college these days. Changing a major is easy. And there are so many possibilities, it shouldn't be an issue to find something enjoyable.
The last thing we talked about was determination. Determination will get you anywhere, and anything. If you go into a situation with a positive attitude and the thoughts of doing well, the outcome will always be good. Always work towards your best and things in life will be easier. He said that if everyone aspired to be the best that they can, the world would be a much more successful place.

It's been a bit of an unorganized post, just rambling on about advice. I'm just so fortunate to have this person, and many others, in my life. They make me aspire to reach my full potential, and for that, I'm more grateful than I can ever show. So for those of you who help to push me, or other people you know, to be the best they can be, I would like to send out a gigantic thank you. It means the world, and it will take until the end of the world for me to show you my appreciation.

Pre-Determined Life

It's times like these where I wish my life was already planned out. I wish I knew what classes to take, what college to go to, what to study, who to marry, where to live. It would be so much easier that way. But nothing in life is easy. That's the thing. We can't have everything, which is why we have to choose. And the choices we make determine the rest of our lives.

I've been so stressed out lately, for a lot of reasons. One being college. I don't know what I want to do. Sure, I've got a few ideas, but I'm skeptical about them. I have no idea where to go, and my choices aren't exactly limited. There are too many options, and I'm stressing out. Plus, I don't know what I want to study, and I'm afraid that I wont like what I initially choose. I know a major can always be changed, but what if I don't know what to change it to? What if I get halfway through college and realize I don't want to do what it is I'm majoring in for the rest of my life? What happens if I run out of back up plans and end up stalled? Where does my life go from there? If I already knew what I was doing, and knew I was happy with it, it would be so easy. But that is just impossible.

I'm seventeen years old, and lost. I don't know what I want in life. I don't even know what I want for a snack. I'm clueless. And I've got absolutely no idea where to begin this hunt for what to do. My thoughts are all scrambled and I don't know how to unscramble them.

All I know is I'm hungry, and I'm confused. Why can't I know all the answers? Why can't I know how my life is going to turn out? Why can't life be easier? We are faced with challenges daily, and the way we respond to those challenges determine who we are in life. I know a bunch of "what if" questions is getting me nowhere, but what's the harm in asking?

I just want to know what it is that I want. Is that too much to ask?

Watch Your Mouth

I've been noticing lately that people are starting to get brutal with one another. They are doing things that are hurtful and are saying things they wouldn't normally say. Why? Because everyone has the Internet to hide behind. Even more than that, they've got Twitter to protect them. "If you don't like what I have to say, unfollow me". Sure, that sounds easy, but when what you have to say is being retweeted and it is genuinely hurtful, maybe you shouldn't have said it in the first place.

I'm definitely not one to judge, I've had my subtweets here and there, but I know I have never said anything brutal in them about someone I pretend to be friends with at school. I'm a very honest person, and I know first hand that sometimes, it can definitely come back around. So you all should watch your backs. "Meet karma getting bitch".

Like I've said a million times before, judging doesn't do anyone any good. But neither does subtweeting or being rude to someone just for the pure joy of it. That is just satanical. Honestly people, if you wouldn't say it in person, DON'T SAY IT ONLINE. It's not that difficult of a concept to grasp.

On a different, yet similar note, twitter is for the purpose of letting everyone know what you're doing at that exact moment. It's not to tweet about how the girl sitting next to you in first period looks like a whore because her skirt is too short, or about how the guy with the pink hair in your fourth period class is a loser. THAT IS NOT OKAY. If it wouldn't be okay to say to the person's face, why would you ever think its okay to say on the Internet? The stuff posted on the internet is out there forever, and anyone can see it, even if you don't think so. But once again, people feel stronger over the internet because it's not their words. It's their thoughts. But thoughts are for yourself, so how about we all keep it that way?

Some people just need to think about what they say before they let the words escape their lips. Unfortunately, we don't live in a world where we can just go around saying whatever we feel like without consequences. There are always consequences. People need to understand that words can hurt. We know the saying "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me", but words can hurt. They can be sharp, and if said a certain way, they can cut deep. So lets pay attention to what we're saying and who we may be hurting. Who knows, that may even create less drama, and that would be two problems solved.

Kill two birds with one stone and think before you speak.

What is Life

I took the SAT's today for the first time, and it was so stressful. Thinking about college in general is stressful. Where to go, what to major in, who to room with. Sometimes, it's just too much. I'm only 17 years old, I'm not supposed to know what I'm doing this weekend. How does the world expect me to know what I want to do for the rest of my life? Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for the chance to go to college and to receive a higher education, but at times, I just can't handle it.

I've never really realized how important it is to continually have good grades. There is never a chance to have a break. Colleges look at not only grades from the previous year, but cumulative GPAs. One little lazy semester can change everything and as a result, the big beautiful acceptance letter from the college of your dreams may never come. Sure, sometimes they understand if you've had serious personal issues, but they can't make exceptions for everybody. If they did, we wouldn't have to suffer through 20 page long applications.
Another thing that stresses me out is the application in general. I can't stand when people ask me to tell them about myself, the good things about me and the bad things about me. I don't like it. I don't ever know what to say, and when I say the good things, I feel as if I'm bragging and sounding cocky. When I say the bad things, it makes me look like I shouldn't get to go to the college. Why can't they just take a guess for themselves? I mean, honestly, when you ask what is good about someone, they will all probably say "I'm a hard worker, I'm a fast learner, I like to focus on my goals". It will all sound the same, so why not make an admissions essay be at least enjoyable?

My mind is so boggled right now, I've had complete over-stimulation today. And it's only 3:30. SAT's weren't  as difficult as I expected, which I'm glad of, but still, it took four hours. FOUR!! So I'm keeping it short and sweet today, because I've got a serious headache. Too much work. Too stressed out. This is a time when I SERIOUSLY need that remote from the movie Click.